What would Wonder Woman eat? Does Superman eat a hero sandwich? Does Robin prefer a sub sandwich? Is Speedy cool with just sides? Well, maybe but let’s get a little more serious.
Not since Popeye and his canned spinach have we had a superhero identified with food. We love our superheroes. We know their families, like the Kents. We know where they live and we know who they fancy. But do we know what they like to eat? What does Batman crave from Alfred’s kitchen after putting down the Joker? Would the White Queen want to dine on buttered sole with a glass of Chardonnay? We don’t freakin’ know! So we decided to look into it.
To respect directness and brevity, let’s just talk about the icons: Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Spider-man, and Wolverine.
Beef Bourguignon with ketchup was Superman’s preferred dish before 2003. Now the Man-of-Steel is a vegetarian (like a certain Amazon princess) and the food that gets him flying is a soft pretzel from a street-side vendor named Mahjoub.
The Dark Knight may be the most ambiguous. The circumstantial evidence says steak but the TV cartoon points to NACHOS! Buuuuuuut everyone really knows “Batman DOESN’T EAT NACHOS!!!!” So according to a survey of billionaire orphans in North America, it seems that a cold plate of revenge is the dish they dream about.
Now let’s talk about Wonder Woman. The Amazon. The demigod that is telepathically linked to animals! We have to believe she would be a vegetarian. Sadly, being a demigod, she has no need to eat. Does this mean she doesn’t eat at all? Supposing she would want to eat on occasion for the experience, what would she like? Really really like? Leaves, berries and those things survivalists dig? Also, the vegetarian bent connects her to Superman which helps with the constant sexual tension the writers have pushed lately. As we all know, vegetarians like to stick together. Sorry Lois, that ‘Beef Bourguignon with Ketchup’ recipe you got from Martha Kent ain’t putting the wind under Superman’s cape these days; you better be prepared for that real life princess to knock off Superman’s onesie with some mean curried tofu.
Our favorite wall-crawler just loves anything Aunt May makes. Aunt May claims that her wheatcakes are Spidey’s favorite for breakfast (eeeooo). What we really know is that it’s her cherry pie that gets him swinging at any time of the day.
Finally Wolverine. Oh Wolverine. What would Logan eat? Well, we’ve seen him eating burgers and we’ve seen him eating chips. We’ve even played him eating a burger with “the works” in an NES video game. Notwithstanding the burger evidence, we know his true love is actually something you drink. BEER. “Okay, grown ups. It’s beer o’clock.”
What we learned is that there is very little insight into the personalities of the superheroes based on their gastronomic persuasions. There are definitely no good lessons in healthy eating to be found either. What we and our friends love to eat actually adds a bit of definition to who we are. Like the Chinese American dude who takes pride in his love of spicy food because of his Sichuan background or the southern beauty artist whose compassion makes her refuse to eat any animal. It’s our DC heroes that we understand the least. Beer and cherry pie actually say a good bit about their Marvel costumed consumers.
NOTE: We have nothing to do with Marvel or DC and these characters are owned and created by them. Please don’t sue.